So I've been rather lacking in the blogging department these days. Seems like I most need to get things off my chest when I am struggling - usually with Andrew. The truth is, I have been convicted lately to love and embrace Andrew for who he is, who God created him to be, and not who I want him to be. It is easy for me to continue to push him in the direction I want him and completely miss out on who he is and what he has to offer.
We had a kinda bad night on Friday - a fight with him sitting BUCK NAKED on the steps at his grandparents house..... and he was naked because he knows it makes us mad when he does that. Anyway, we spent some time calming him and helping him pray through his high anxiety. Seemed to be fine the rest of the night. The next morning I was exhasted since Court had been throwing up every 30 min all night long, he came in my room...said "I love you Mom"...kissed me on the cheek...and waited for me to return his kiss. I knew it was a special moment with him - ones that almost never happen. He initiated some Andrew love and I gladly embraced it. Eric later said that he was very conversational all morning. And as if he could read my mind..(What did we do different yesterday? What did or didn't he eat? What supplements did we miss? Etc..) ..which often he can....he said "I guess we should just say a prayer of thanks instead of trying to figure out what we did differently to make it happen."
I'm learning to except the moments - and try to balance the "helping him improve" and "loving him for who he is". Who knew life was going to be so darned complicated!