Thursday, September 15, 2011
Homeschooling
So....again sorry for the long intermission. Who knew having a baby was so exhausting and mentally draining. Awwww I did, that's why I said no more children...he...he.... Good thing he's so stinkin cute! Will post new photos soon. Anyway, on to todays post. So after a bad back to school night for Ms Courtney we decided rather suddenly and late for that matter - to homeschool her. Now if you have ever been in our home during homework time - I'm sure you are saying to yourself "They are going to rip each others hair out and hate each other." Yes, that thought crossed my mind. However, I have been feeling prompted by the Lord that I need to strengthen my relationship with her and create a safer (emotionally) and more loving environment for her. We don't have the best relationship. I will be the first to admit that, but I don't want it to be that way. Its not the way God intended us to be with each other, so through daily prayer and reliance on Him, I think this is going to be an amazing year for both of us. A year we will forever remember as the start of a close and bonded relationship that we never had before. I try not to blame the Autism for my lack of emotional closeness with the kids, but it is what it is. I can no longer use that as an excuse when God has commanded us to let him have all our junk and to live and love as Christ did. All this to say, yes, I recognize that the early road of this journey will undeniably challenging in many ways. Our communication and reponses to one another will have to be changed - but this first two weeks have gone really really well. (Except one day - She didn't just wake up on the wrong side of the bed - she woke up on the wrong side of the moon) She is excited to spend quality time with me - and I am excited to see her learning in an environment she is comfortable and doens't have anxiety. Only time will tell how successful of a teacher I shall be, but I am already leaps and bounds ahead of what kind of a mother I was.
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2 comments:
How encouraging, Ame! You'll be in my thoughts & prayers. I haven't had the same kind of struggles but can resonate with the feeling of not being the kind of mom I want to be & He meant me to be. Love you!
I'm excited for you Amy! For homeschooling, for your relationship with your daughter, your family dynamics, and how that will effect your whole life. I hope we get to see you this week.
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